Tuesday, August 31, 2010

exhausted

Alright team, im tired.
Im excessive which makes me sleepy somedays!

Last week, I had 2 WHOLE days off in a row, so I tried my hand at controlled social drinking with my lovelies. This went super well, but did manage to result in a bit of a Ben and Jerry's bonanza and that left me with a very sore tummy and 24 hours of sugar rushes....no likey :(

I have been working every day ever since. I must say that, 6-7 days a week of work combined with the heat coming back on full force in this city has left me pretty hazy. 
I have reinforced the joy that is lying in front of the fan after a long day of work having a cup of tea and writing stuff....
Im also working on a new piece of art. And as you all know im defo into my music BIG TIME. 

Like I said in my last blog. The 3 things that matter most are ART, MUSIC, AND LOVE. 

These lyrics are among my fave and definitely ring true to some recent events.......

But hey, I'm still addicted to feeling

Hey

kiss me (I kiss you)

kiss me (I kiss you)

I know about you I've been told about you
I've been waiting for you in the air's thin

tiny holes

and everybody wants to know you
it's wrapped up moon river

then beyond the blinds and the new white slacks
a light
sliding into the city
tunnel beneath the feet of the people in the city

roamin' roamin' roamin' in the city and

crossway boy
crossway boy
downtownwaterfront boy

in the shadows where the envy and the motor meet and the

she's on the phone again
surfin'
she's on the phone again

she's calling from america
she's calling from america

she's surfing
she's moshing

and the girls are diving
and the girls are up to something

animal boything
up on the roof again boything

to've been down there
where there's every kinda lack

make it down to the delaware and

i'm in your head and

moaner

moaner moaner moaner

rudy,
getthe
getthe
getthe
getthe
getthe

night

the city loves you
city loves a boyfriend

love walks with the boyfriend
the city loves a boyfriend

friends walking with the boyfriend
and the night's with the boyfriend

and the city loves you
loves you
loves you

loves everyone

everyone is smiling

the smiling is pushing it around
is pushing it around like the shadows
in the evolution in the dark

and the

super boys

where
time is old
when
time is everything
when
time of all this started

as we turn to earth
earth wind and fire

get the sun in your head

black metal walls are falling

i am the hunger above your town
(a little sound in a little amp)
i am dubious
(i am metal)

i am stainless

i am milk in your plastic

i am wrapped in ribs and left alone
on a full moon
where the only thing i could do
lying awake on the floor
at night
the boys who cough

a-cough awake
a-cough awake
ah ah ah
AH AH AH

water into you to me
constantly
constantly

without
without
without

without again
without again

your telephone numbers move across the water

the ocean between us opens

the silence is indifferent

and love
love
love
love


love walks with the boyfriend
the city loves a boyfriend
friends walking
friends walking with the boyfriend
the city loves a boyfriend

everybody loves a boyfriend

you left me alone

you left me alone

with a full moon
full moon
full moon
full moon

boys
boys
boys
boys
white crosswaycrossway boys
down on the waterfront
 
 xx

Saturday, August 28, 2010

darkness


SO I'm not gonna lie. Ive been through some stuff...This year especially has been a HUGE year of breaking and growth. And Im finally happy to say that the darkness is lifting :)

Those of you who have been there through every step of the way-thank you and you all know who you are. There is no way I can ever explain my gratitude, however just know that I will forever return the love.

Its very hard to explain exactly what Im trying to tell the world right now...lets just say that I am finally seeing the world clearly and appreciating how beautiful the world can be. 
Everything happens for a reason. EVERYTHING

I was meant to be here in new york, as nothing and nowhere you ever live in this world will show you as much about yourself as this place. If you can survive it
A lot of people leave new york city as it can be a very dark place, and the saying is true that like attracts like.
If you become dark, you will attract that. But now.....I'm attracting all the love into my life, I can literally feel my body tingling with it.
Very surreal...

I had random moments where I listened to my intuition which has lead me to the people I know now and where I am in my life. I have to say....its awesome. 

Everyday random conversations I have with people I have met recently have been changing and shaping my life for the better. I now know that this was all meant to happen. 

I have imagined living here in this city ever since I was a little girl. And I let that vision manifest itself and become a reality. I knew I would always make it back here, and just as I knew that I also know that I will have the career that I want and find the love that I want. Because I IMAGINED it to happen. 



So with that said (and my john lennon picture binge), I will be visiting the John Lennon imagine area in central park (just for you mama) and listen to those die hard fans, and post the pictures. 

I will also have to post the pictures that I am taking for a super awesome magazine called "le black book" in australia. Just street style pics of the amazing every day people in this city....yes there are too many to count but I feel as if I can at least show you a snippet of the awesomeness that is NYC!!!

I also had a wicked convo with a kindred spirit that I have in this world...turns out we will be reuniting early in 2011. This news pleases me very much, and the fact that he may be residing here in new york with me is even better!!! yeeeeoowwww


Next blog wont be so emotional  I swear!!! haha

Ok so bye for now and just so you know....Art, Music and Love are all that matters in this life. 

xx

Thursday, August 26, 2010

Monkey Sphere

Have you ever heard the term "monkey sphere"???

Apparently, it is the definition of your mind space. You can only keep 100 people in your monkey sphere at one point in time.
So I guess that means for 530 of my "friends" on fb....I will have to exclude you from my monkey sphere. Sorry.



Even though the term is meant to define people in the space, I have decided to include in this blog all the things that are fresh in my monkey sphere this morning. 

Last night there was a small gathering. It was awesome. LOUD LOUD music. Dancing like no one was watching, beers,and conversations about why we love new york so much. 
Oh and talks of boys of course!

The night ended on a walk to w4th where I found a bunch of vintage records which I will now hang in my room cos I love love album cover photography. 
It combines two great loves of my life.....photography and music. 

So this morning the things in my monkey sphere are:

1) Colour colour colour in my outfits and make up ( i love blue eyes and pink lips)




2) Massive Attack "unfinished sympathy" such a great tune
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E27aE2nt4Po


3) The David Lachapelle exhibition opening back up on Sept 13 at "paul kasmin gallery"

4) Freedom...Im 100% totally free, always have and always will be

5) Love. Its all there is. I love to love and I love being loved.


till next time...

xx

Tuesday, August 24, 2010

Watch the sheezy out of this

I want you allllll to watch this. Its super cute :) 


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yedD4JsZyT0

season

Have you ever heard the expression everything for a season?
Well today feels as if it is the first day of  a new season.. the weather got cold enough to wear a jacket (loving it btw). 

I recall a conversation I had with someone once. I was all freaking out because I wanted to hold onto the time I was having and I was feeling anxious about it coming to an end....they said "everything for a reason and for a season"

Now I see what they meant.

Now is the new season, and it feels AWESOME!!! Although a little strange.

AND after writing this post. I remember that is is  a full moon here in new york. And now this all makes so much sense!

I have been feelings as if shit is about to start happening. Getting inspired again....people interested in working with me.

Here is what I am looking at now...a few of them are my fave artist rae caesar. True genius:Born as a dog of course 

Loving ITTTTT
xx

Saturday, August 21, 2010

i heart my friends

Just some random pics from our little street fiesta last night :) It may have been some of the best convo ive had in a while. Just came to the realization that I never thought of myself as "real" however that is exactly what people have been saying about me as the best way to describe me. I really like this...I would die a million times over if people thought I was fake...But I honestly just cant be bothered with being anyone but who I am. Cos I like being that way, and Im lucky enough to have people who like me that way too! :) yeeeeeee

lower east side, street drinking crew 08.20.10

bye byes :(
Here are some random pics from the past couple of weeks...

beer

last night was awesome! I am definitely having a strong love affair with beer right now.

It just makes you feel so awesome..or is that being drunk in general?

So I chatted to my friend on skype before picking up 2 travellers to sip on during the train ride to meet my friend Bromson in the Lower East Side. He had just been on a date so he showed up a little tipsy. I had been sipping on coors light with my headphones on as loud as they could go so i was feeling fantastic also.
We met, had a big hug then looked at each other and said "im kinda drunk....lets have an awesome night"
Grabbed another traveller on the way to the bar, then got there and this place was pretentious as hell. Totally not our scene. Our friend Mike is leaving for DC today, and last night was his going away party at this place so we definitely had to go. But we were also keen to leave and go somewhere else that was a little more mellow.
Somehow, we decided it was a good idea to park ourselves up on a bench in the middle of the street between lanes. And actually, we loved it so much sitting outside and talking with our beers in paper bags that we stayed there all night. Watched the world go by....have beautiful conversation....Beautiful night.

Somehow ending up in a stolen slice of pizza at rays, yelling at the cab driver cos he got lost, then another skype conversation until the sun came up.

Maybe I shouldnt have done the last part....Or maybe, it was the perfect end to a great night and all its randomness.

My 3rd full new york moon is coming as well...which can only mean more transformations and crazy energy :)

xx

Friday, August 20, 2010

food

So my friend kate wrote a blog about food and how Orsum it is..and how it makes her happy for a minute before feeling empty again.
I definitely know that feeling my sweety Kate :( especially once every now and again where i swear to god , the only thing in the world that I want is to rip someones head off, then sit down with a peanut butter sandwich.

Peanut butter is so good by the way.

However, at the moment Im too busy for food and for the past 2 nights Ive been having a glass of milk for tea. And I know its unhealthy but whatever.

I have 2 sweet sweet days off IN A ROW and I am SO excited! Today I have a meeting at a studio, then tonight a going away party where I can literally HEAR the beer calling my name!

Its been a very full on week, much like every other week lately.

I must say, if there was a choice between what made me happier out of food or beer......I think Id pick the beer
Its lovely

xx

Tuesday, August 17, 2010

today

was a weird day. up and down, but in the end it was FLYYYYING

started off feeling absolutely awful and tired :( no good.
then get to my new old job and when waiting outside a fashion student asks to take a picture of me for my outfit for "future trends" that was really cute cos i felt yucky as hell today.

then start working the place i worked at when i first lived in new york...starting to overthink the situation, then realised that i neednt do so and that everyone goes back and forth with that job.

I guess I was frustrated, but then put my life into perspective. Maybe Im growing up!
Anyway, it was nice to be working at a place where the managers treat the staff nicely again.

It was nice to have good energy around me.
I also got a meeting for my latest email bombardement this week, and one in september so thats all good too!

left working feeling not tired and pretty stoked with the turn of events.

Have decided who to keep out of my life and who to bring in....Lets just say, there are going to be changes and it is all about what is going to be best for ME.
I am over putting other people (apart from my family and close soul mates) before me.

From now on, I think I will be a wee bit more selfish...in order to survive and maintain happiness.
I think that is how I would like to live from now on :)

K thanks bye xx

Monday, August 16, 2010

never

Underestimate the power of 2 things in life when your highly strung...
A good CRY and YELLING at someone random.
Unfortunately today, I pretty much did both. I was in a super hyper sensitive or angry mood, whatever the next minute brought to me i felt.
Almost had a tear, then got pissed off cos i didnt want to!. Then had one of those creepy new york train guys try his hardest to talk to me. The eyes of death didnt work, so in the end he copped the abuse, swearing and hands up in his face before i stormed off the train.

Soon after I got into cell reception, I laughed to myself then g chatted my totally ORSUM friend Kate who i knew would appreciate this.

And i have to say, that to yell at someone made me feel a million, trillion times better!!

SO the moral of the story is...If you feel rage, then yell. If you feel sad then cry. And as it turns out, new york is the best place in the world to be in rage because you are almost guaranteed not to see that person ever again :)

Unless you want to see someone again cos they are super hot...well then thats a damn shame

xx

Friday, August 13, 2010

my love

Just another drunken night out at the most classy establishment in new york...down the hatch.
this statement is totally untrue. no matter what time of the night or day you go to this bar...the restroom always smells like wee and its pretty gross.
nonetheless, its a regular for me and my friends and its so bad that its good!

Someone is always winning an open bar and im always there on time for it. the very rare occasion where im on time for anything other than work.

Anyway, so im kinda nervous about drinking in general at the moment, because due to my recent stress it has made me feel a little anxious at some point in the night or the next day.

But not today.

I had SUCH a good night. Even though i have worked 8 days straight of 11 hour days in retail ( i know, its awful) I hadnt eaten dinner cos i didnt have time. Its hot and humid as hell and the list goes on.
It was so good to see my friends and have those conversations that somehow alter your perspective just a little bit. Sometimes people say things to you without knowing that its exactly what you need to hear.

And I love how everything can change in a new york minute. The expression holds true for sure.

I love concept. I love parody. I am deeply in love with art :)

love love xx

Tuesday, August 10, 2010

how time flies...

so yesterday, i had an attack with my phone in toilet ordeal :( sucks to be me cos im literally broke and cant afford a new one! laaame (this is living the dream!) ANYWAY..so i turned on my old ny phone that i used for 2 weeks when i first got here and started reading all the text messages between me and those that i choose to keep anonymous.

It got me thinking, how time has flown by. I have been in this city for 2 months which feels as if its been a lifetime.

If there is one place in the world that will teach you everything about yourself the hard way then it is this one. More so than any other place that i have lived.

When you read old text messages, diaries, letters etc it actually takes you emotionally back to the place that you were. Its very strange. And then you realise who you are now.

A very different and much stronger person i am now than 2 months ago.

The best of times, and the worst of times for sure 

Thank you New York

Friday, August 6, 2010

New York dreams

new york city...the city of dreams right?
Thats why i came here anyway. Plus i love this city as its the only place in the world where it is minorly acceptable to wear a pink wig with a tutu to your day job with very little judgement from people.

Ive been thinking a lot about dreams recently (metaphorically and literally) Am i the only one chasing a dream and feeling frustrated because it isnt happening as quickly as I would like? Or does everyone feel that way?

The grass is always greener I suppose. Being a girl who has travelled loads, I can only look back on other experiences and places and think..."oh that was so much better than this"
However in reality, life goes up and life goes down. You have good days and bad. You meet good people and you meet bad...No matter where you are.

I guess today, I miss the antipodes and my special friends down in the southern hemisphere..I also miss being able to walk home from work instead of having to take the subway in summer, in new york!!!
its too hot down there :( no bueno

Tomorrow will be an AWESOME day. Despite going to work. I am gonna take my camera out with me...and see what I come back with

Thursday, August 5, 2010

miss..me

SO this is my first post...ever.
I used to think that blogging was so lame, but i have changed my tune..I dont know why.

Ive spent 4 years travelling the world and it has been a huge battle, but i have learnt sooo much and wouldnt trade it for anything in the world.
I have worked with some incredible icons in the photography industry (most recently Grace Coddington :) who was amazing to watch!) I have seen true beauty being made in front of my very eyes and feel so lucky to have been a part of it.

I love photography. Clothes. Shoes. Tattoos. Piercings. Beer. People. Music. Art and Love.

Its crazy to think that pretty much anywhere I go in the world, I will probably know someone near by to have coffee with.

I take random pictures day to day of things I see as well, will post some asap.
Someone once asked me how I knew I wanted to be a photographer and I thought about it for a second, then said-because I see the world in pictures.

Even if I dont end up taking photos for $$$ I know who I am..But in all honesty, I dont think I can ever live in another industry other than the one I love so dearly!

So that is my first post..about nothing really, the ones to come will get more and more juicy :)

xx